He keeps a pack of cigarettes, I keep a pack of chewing gum…

He always keeps a pack of cigarettes with him; his day cannot pass without his cigarette.

I always keep a pack of chewing gum with me, my day cannot pass with my gum.

If he doesn’t have a cigarette with him, he might ask a stranger for one.

If I don’t have a chewing gum with me, I might ask a stranger for one.

"Cigarette" a picture by SuperFantastic licensed under CC retrieved from Flickr

Whenever he gets pissed off, he lights a cigarette.

Whenever I get pissed off, I chew a gum.

If he remains pissed off, he lights another one.

If I remain pissed off, I chew another one.

His cigarette relaxes him.

My chewing gum relaxes me.

If he is hungry, he smokes a cigarette.

If I am hungry, I chew a gum.

When he goes to the supermarket, he buys several packs of cigarettes and keep them around.

When I go to the supermarket, I buy several packs of chewing gum and keep them around.

His cigarette hurts his lungs.

My chewing gum hurts my teeth.

He can’t live without his lungs.

I can live without my teeth.

I better offer him some chewing gum… and keep him next to me!!!

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2 thoughts on “He keeps a pack of cigarettes, I keep a pack of chewing gum…

  1. well going to a sugar free gum and having it in moderation (just so that sugar alcohol and artificial sweeteners don’t cause you diarrhea :p), your teeth will be just fine!

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